So, here we are in June. Six months into my year of stories - entering at least one short story competition every month. The first one I entered, way back in January, was in Writing Magazine this month, so from here on in I will be desperately searching for my name in the shortlists...it wasn't there this month.
I've almost forgotten that what I REALLY want is an email to congratulate me on winning one!
Although I will be glad to go back to focussing on writing longer fiction, I am sure it is doing me good, this writing a range of genres, with a tight word-count. I really wasn't keen on writing a children's story and it was more fun than I thought. Next I've got to write an adult fairy story, and I was dreading that. After a two-hour plotting session at the local soft-play centre at half term, while my children zipped around like demented moths, I've actually got so many ideas burning to squiggle out of my fingers that I'm afraid of starting. I've got that fizzy feeling you get when something is going well, and you know it could be good (as long as you don't cock it up between concept and keyboard).
I'm still struggling to know if I'm being original enough - clearly originality is not my strength - but I'm loving the creating, the writing and even (dare I admit it?) the editing. It doesn't feel too scary, editing 2000 words or so.
I'm afraid now, though. Until now, I was able to send these stories off into the great blue yonder with little thought of what they might meet, but now that the first has been judged, and deemed unworthy of anything, I can't avoid knowing that, slowly but relentlessly, month after month, they are being judged. And unless I get that email, it will be rejection after rejection.
I said to a friend, "What if I get to the end of the year, and haven't been placed let alone won?"
He said, "Would you stop writing?"
I didn't even have to think about that one. So I suppose I'll have to weather any rejection, implied or worse, and accept that I'm having a blast writing....and that makes it worthwhile.